Thursday 22 September 2016

Week 18 - Stress and it's effects on my MS

Our flight to Portugal leaves Gatwick at 06:10am on Saturday morning and something absolutely catastrophic has happened.
Gareth having checked his passport a week ago went to use it as a form of ID to collect a parcel and discovered the photo part of the passport is damaged and will not be allowed to use to fly. He's now driving up to Durham in the northeast of England (a good 5-6 hour drive) for an appointment at 9am tomorrow where they may or may not agree to do a replacement document in 4 hours.
If they don't replace it then the likelihood is the whole first week of our holiday might be lost.
I've got the DVLA to agree to send me temporary driving documents by recorded delivery which hopefully will arrive tomorrow which would mean I 'could' fly out there on my own and he joins me later if he has to wait for a replacement for the requisite 5 days.
The stress and worry of it all has sent me into a complete tailspin, my legs are completely numb, as is the lower part of my torso, and everything is weak and trembling. and I'm basically a complete and utter wreck.
I know it's just stress & worry about passports, replacement driving licences, holiday and that Gareth's driven to the other end of the country with the hope they take pity and issue a new passport in 4 hours rather than a week.
Stress has such a huge impact on my body it's like an amplifier for every rubbish thing that MS made me feel - or not feel as I am right now. It's in my mind, logically I know this but it's like the clock has been turned back to last March and it's scary.
I've come home to work from home to the comfort of the sofa with the puppy dogs with food porn on in the background. I've decided to have a relaxation marathon so I have a very expensive ready meal for one from the farm shop - sad lonely girl food.
Gareth has made it to Durham - apparently the hotel is a complete duffer but it's a bed for the night so not exactly the end of the world.
We are both incredibly on edge and nervous about tomorrow, it's so very important to both of us. I suspect sleep tonight might not be the best and that's probably not going to help much with the amplified sensations that I'm experiencing, but hey if it all goes to plan I have 2 weeks in Portugal to relax and de-stress.
All available extremities are crossed, please let him come home tomorrow with a passport

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