Thursday, 3 January 2019

3 years 30 weeks happy new year

Another year done. I hope everyone had an awesome break for Christmas and New Year. Wishing you all the best for a happy, healthy 2019

The last 3 weeks have been manic with work Christmas 'doooooos', then travelling. Over the holidays I've driven 850 miles, so I'm now back in work for a rest.

Up to Yorkshire for Christmas with Gareths family (Via Knowle to drop christmas presents off for my brothers wife and her mum) 30 mile round trips each day to Baffles Dog Park to wear out the beasties - in Yorkshire this is a 3 hour endeavour (I was gutted last night when someone on a facebook group I'm part of posted that there is one less than 10 minutes from the in laws house) then off to deepest darkest Wales to see Aunty Kathy with a detour near Manchester to Fido's fields. Back home again via Knowle this time to actually see Karen and her mum (who were both away on our journey up)

It's been lovely to see everyone and catch up, some pretty epic food has been prepared and enjoyed. The dogs as usual were firm favourites with everyone, with Bella causing many tears up in Halifax as she reminds everyone of a young Jessie -their dog who crossed the rainbow bridge last year.

MS wise - well 7 days in strange beds took it's toll but it was managable, just the usual overly tired with pseudo symptom flares. A few days back in my own bed again and I can feel my legs again YAY - another few days of 'rest/work' and all should be back to normal again.

New year, fresh start time again, resolutions include
  • Dry January (Coming along nicely)
  • Smoke less (preferably nothing but less is good)
  • Continue with weight loss (coming along nicely)
  • Go to the gym at least 3 times a week (It's the 3rd - I've not been there yet - so 3 of the next 4 days it is then)
  • Be less of a bitch / angry about little inconsequential stuff (does it count if I was in car snippy at someone who couldn't hear me??)
  • Stop 'planning to do things but never getting round to them' - like holidays (Can't actually talk about this until later in the year)
This year I want to be positive, hopeful and most of all do some really powerful things to take back control of my own destiny whereI can, getting myself into something resembling a 'fit' state will go a long way towards that I hope.

Positivity - that's what this year is for - lots of positivity

Much love

Tuesday, 11 December 2018

3 years 27 weeks - life took over for a while there.

Oh dear here I go again with the apologies.

It’s been 4 weeks - I AM SOOOOOO SORRY

What’s been happening? Well we did the good food show at the  NEC, I spent way too much money, I used Bob rather than trying to walk it, and it was a great day. Even drove there and back in the same day  sadly we didn’t get to catch up with any of the friends in the midlands because of timing and it being a work day.

Work has been seriously mad, so much going on, my early strarts are earlier and my days end later than they have in many years.

I have a new IV, he’s a good kid and loves sci-fi so I’m going to get to see lots of awesome movies that Gareth won’t go to see with me because he’s too much of an old man to appreciate them 😂

Today would have been my dads 78th birthday, it’s been 15 years since we lost him and for once I’ve not felt the need to try and choke down a bottle of  Newcastle Brown for it ..., he loved it, but oh my it makes me gag .... sorry Dad but I really can’t stand the stuff 😂

So Christmas is nearly here again, I can report that once again I have learnt bugger all frm previous years gifts haven’t been purchased, there’s not a single decoration up but the drinks cabinet looks epic  - sadly since we are off to do the great UK circuit with 3 dogs the cabinet will be spending the season home alone 😔

Christmas in Halifax with Gareths family and then off to Wales for a few days with Aunty Kathy, home in time for new year

I’ve also had my hair all cut off - I have short hair for the first time in about 20 years and I’m properly blonde again rather than a sort of ‘mouse’ colour with strategic highlights to make it less boring. It’s also so easy the take care of - wash and leave - i now understand why teenage boys prefer this look 😂😂😂

In health news - I’ve lost nearly 2 stone in weight in the last couple of months that’s 22lbs if you’re that way inclined or 10kg if you’re still working in old money 😎 I’m really proud of me for this.

Over the course of my adult life, my weight and I have had a very ‘up and down’ relationship - quite literally I’ve been every size between a 10 and a 20 on many occasions. I’ve tried every diet there is with varying success and enthusiasm.

Right now I’m simply following a very basic 16:8 fasting rule - google it there is loads of information out there - for 16 hours each day I don’t have anything with a calorific value and for the other 8 I have what I want but I don’t take the piss for me 11pm - 5pm are my fasting hours - I can sleep half of them which helps. During working hours I have black coffee and plenty of water to keep the hangry at bay

 a glass of wine, a G&T, a dessert or a few cheese and crackers is okay - an absolute load of any of these is not. Dirty Thursday dinner was chicken nuggets and French fries and I had a little chocolate later.

All things considered life is pretty fantastic Christmas is coming, a little calm and downtime will be very welcome over the season.

Again I’m sorry posts have been very sporadic of late, I’ve done such a lot of hours at work and when I’ve been at home I usually fall asleep after dinner. It’s getting better I have new team members on boarding and it will allow me to take a step back and concentrate on more strategic work than being too ‘down and dirty’ in the detail.

I promise to be less crap 💩

Wishing everyone an awesome time I will waffle at you all some more very soon

Much love

Wednesday, 31 October 2018

3yrs 22 wks - New blood results and the price of not sleeping properly

It seems like I'm always saying sorry these days, I did post last week (eventually) but forgot to put the links in Twitter and Faceboob so I don't think many people saw it except those who have done the 'email me when there's new stuff' botton.
The full price of the damage to my back lugging the Whoppet out of the field, the agonising pain and discomfort came full circle this last week - the disrupted sleep brought me down with a cold - my bodies natural defence to lack of proper sleep is to give me a bad throat, snotty nose, a cough and generally make me fee like crap for 5 days.
Monthly bloods were taken a week last Friday so a good 6 days before I got grotty so they actully look pretty good for once - except the thyroid one - but the doctor has increased the dosage on my Levothyroxine and promised to get it under control.
As usual at this time of year I'm starting to vaguely acknowledge that Christmas is coming and I really should do something about that. As usual thinking about it is all we have done, Gareth and I had a specualtive chat about gift ideas for various family members over lunch at Pho in town over the weekend. We didn't actually agree on any particular plan or buy anything, but we talked about it - so that's better than the last few years I guess.
Dog walking at this time of year in the evenings after work is DARK ... very very dark, the dogs have neon light up collars, all balls glow and Gareth and I are wrapped up like arctic explorers with balaclavas, gloves, scarfs, thick coats, jumpers double socks, even Bella the Whoppet has a lovely warm snuggly coat to wear and we're all still freezing our metaphorical nuts off. Better get used to it because it's going to be like this until March LOL
In other news, we ordered another piece of furniture from Oak Furniture Land - usual delivery instructions of 'send on a small van - under no circumstances send on a 7.5 tonne lorry' - you'd think after last time and them makin  that someone might say 'oh shit it's them again' and not make the same mistake for a 4th time - wrong - once again a 7.5t truck parked up on the main road, 2 very grumpy drivers who've walked down the 200 + meters to our house and decided that they can't carry or push the furniture safely on a skate. Allegedly this is replanned for the correect vehicle at the end of the week - I will believe it when I see it.

So here we go bloods - a few blanks this week as I now get them online from my doctors and I couldn't find a couple of results.

Thursday, 25 October 2018

3 yrs 21 weeks - The correct way to carry a dog log distances

Aologies for the absence. My only defence is I managed to injure myself quite badly and have been off my face on medication for a while.
Bella the 'Whippet' (and I use that term very losely - the 62.5% whippet is counterbalanced with 25% German short haird pointer) is really more of a Whoppet. Had a strop about leaving the park because daddy wasn't there, lay down in the middle of the park and refused to move. I had to carry her the best part of the park back to the car and have managed to not only pull a muscle in by back, but trap a nerve at the same time. Co-Proxamol at full dosage, Diazapam to try and release the muscle spasm.
It took me a week to even go to the doctors about it, my power of postive thinking to heal stuff failed spectacularly I've struggled to even function through the pain let alone be a more constructive member of society.
Things to note through this time
  • We've had the inlaws down for a visit, it was lovely to see them and lots of catching up was done and lovely food eaten.
  • We went to the comedy loft in Reading and saw Reginald D Hunter again and it was very funny even though laughing hurt a lot
  • We've had 2 dog emergencies, one with Winston nibbling the fur off his feet and legs which is now resolved and the second yesterday when Amber managed to get access to a new bag of dog food and try to eat her own body weight in dry food - she looked like she swallowed a football, there was much being sick, her arse falling off, uncontrollable flatulence - I'm hoping by the time I get home this will have lessened.
  • I've been signed off from the grief counselling sessions I've been having in recent months. I'm in a happier place now, it's never going to be alright about the number of people I've lost, but I'm okay that it will never be alright - if that makes een the slightest bit of sense
  • We had Kim and Lasse over for dinner again, a masterpiece of a combine come dine with me experience with lots of my lovely specility spare ribs to start, Gareth awewsome indoensian peanut chicken with egg fried rice (done properly not that wierd rice that looks like it has scrambled egg stirred through it) and then Kims amazing home made warm cinnamon rolls for dessert
Since then I’ve been flat out at work and what with a couple of weeks of crappy sleep because of my back ..... well now I’ve got a cold. I’m feeling properly sorry for myself, Gareth was crying with laughter this morning saying only dogs could hear my voice. After a bazillion gallons of pure honey and lemon juice the pitch has now lowered to Barry White but with a touch of baaaaaimg ..... like a sheep 🐑 I threw up 3 times in the field walking the dogs tonight but felt a lot better afterwards. 

Swings and roundabouts I guess by Monday when I’m back to work I will feel perfectly fine. In the interim I will banish myself to the spare room, the only beings in my house who will be kissed for the next few days will have 4 legs and tails. 

Tuesday, 25 September 2018

3 years 17 & 18 weeks – Monthly bloods done and the price you pay for overdoing stuff

It’s been a funny old couple of weeks for me, apologies for the late post (faster than the last one though) the reason for this will become clear.

We did the ‘Royal Berkshire Show’ last weekend, very spur of the moment I went for Oxygen then popped home, picked up Gareth and Bella and off we went. Bob was on a half(ish) charge and the sound of the food hall was calling us.

Now in hindsight – taking the dog along was not our best plan. No dogs in the food hall (Kind of obvious really, and the whippet’s not passing for a guide dog any time soon LOL) We roamed for miles, I got lost and couldn’t find the car park. Fortunately Gareth remembered there had been a massive crane by out entrance so we made our way back towards it hoping that there was only one at the show. Bob was gasping for the last dregs of electricity in his batteries as we arrived back at the car.

All in all, along with shopping, faffing around, doing some house stuff and a couple of very late nights, because once again my Thyroid prescription had not come back on time – I ended up broken. Missing a day of thyroid meds and the effect is almost instantaneous physical fatigue. In my case this means my legs turn to jelly, they literally shake – as Gareth so delightfully referred to it – they shake like a shitting dog L

I came home at mid-day on Monday and worked from couch for the afternoon. Randomly it really upset me to think I might need Bob at work – he’s supposed to be my fun friend not a work thing. On Tuesday I got over myself and got Bob out and went for it. It was all in my head, the day was fine, I even had some envious ‘damn that’s a bit nippy, can I have a go in it’ comments which made me laugh. It took me a few attempts to work out how to swipe a security pad and still be able to open a door, but I got there. Wednesday I took my stick in with me (yep I finally found it) but by Thursday I was back to normal again.

It’s Friday now, I’m working from home, the bedding is being washed in the background. It’s blowing a hoolie here, the local facebook group is full of people asking for the details of good fencing people and for once we’re not one of them thanks to the work we had done to get rid of the crappy old ones.

The weekend came and went, British summer seems to have morphed straight into Winter, it’s cold, it’s wet and there is frost on my car first thing each morning now L Blood results should be available shortly so I’m going to hold off hitting the post button until I get them (EDIT – sadly they haven’t been reviewed yet and this is over a week late to be posted so I’ll post this now and put results out tomorrow.

Today I’ve had to resort to Bob at work again after some epic walks between the buildings for meetings this morning. To be honest I don’t feel so crap about that today it just is what it is and life goes on.

Hope everyone is well xxx

Saturday, 15 September 2018

4 years ago diagnosis week continues

15/09/14 11:42

The LP results have thrown up some interesting bits it would appear I've been fighting a viral infection viral meningitis and Lyne disease have been mentioned. Apparently it's treated like flu - go lie down and rest drink lots of fluids.
The CT scan showed a 'fuzzy bit' in my brain though so the MRI which is now scheduled for Thursday will look into that

YAY for viral meningitis :-)

Friday, 14 September 2018

More realtime Diagnosis week from facebook

08:21 - Lumbar puncture in progress..... As I type :-(

(note this first attempt is when they hit the nerve for my right leg and I nearly Eric Cantona'd the head off the doctor who was 'supervising')

12:12 - Why am I waaaaaaaaiiiiiiiting, Whyyyyyyyyyyyy am I waaaaaaaaiiiiiiiting, Whyyyyyyyyyyyy am I waaaaaaaaiiiiiiiting - to get more paaaaaain YAY ;-) Streaming the Invictus Games on BBC iPlayer on the hospital WiFi. Still no sucessfully done lumbar puncture and they want me to rest for 5 hours once it's actually done

17:48 - Getting REALLY REALLY fed up now, at lunch there were 2 people in front of me for the anethesiologist and now nobody can tell me where I am in the queue. I'm tempted to just go home TBH I can feel crappy and take my own meds there as easily as I can here, but in better surroundings. Furious that BUPA closes all weekend and I can't do anything about this . I have an awful feeling I'm going to be here all night again because there is no organisation at all.

18:25 - Apparently they're on the way to get me. Here we go again, lumbar puncture number 6 of the day :-( *sob*

19:50 - Lumbar puncture count for the day is 8 !!!!! But it's finally done TFFT !!!!

23:43 - FREEDOM ...... well until the MRI tomorrow I have to be back at 10am. Good news, no blood found in what they took from the LP. Now just need the MRI to say whatever they saw on the CT scan that they described as 'shadows' is nothing and I can be happy to only have a 7 day migraine :-) xxx

It's quite odd reading all this back 'as it happened'. Odd in that I'd kind of convinced myself that I'd glossed over what was happening and made it seem less stressful than it actually was.

Reading it back I seem to be quite naievely thinking it's all a big nothing, although by submitting to 8 LP's in one day I was clearly taking it seriously too.

It's a bit like reading a book again, you know the ending but there are little things that happen on the path there that are new, and to be honest there are things that you 'hope' turn out differently - a bit like watching The Great Escape for the hundredth time and Steve McQueen is on that motorbike trying to jump the fence and you hope that 'this time he makes it' - you know it won't happen, history didn't happen that way, he didn't make it, he's never going to, but that little voice in your head still whispers in hope that perhaps this time it could be different.

Human nature I guess